Spanky's Place

Well, the day after Christmas, it started making  a terrible noise (KA-POKATA-PING, KA-POKATA-PING, KA-POKATA-PING) when I was driving, so I stopped in at Desert Rat 4x4 (I like the way I have been treated there in the past, and will continue to go there in the future, so all of you Fly'in Highers can just stop right there!) and had them check it out.

Well, after about an hour and a half, (they took it romping out back and then put it up on the rack, to check out everything, not just the noise.) He brought me the news,....it was bad,....really bad,....it was in fact, painful,...

...it was, EVERYTHING!!

That's right, everything was wrong with my beloved truck.  Bad shocks, bad brakes, bad transfer case, bad transmission, bad bearings, bad hubs, bad dog, bad breath, bad bushings, bad engine, bad, bad, BAD, BAD, BAD! Total estimated cost of repair:  over five thousand dollars.  Five BIG ones; FIFTY FRANKLINS; 5K; 250 AJ's; let's face it, no matter how you describe it, it was a lot of moolah.   In fact, (as many of you may well remember), it was going to cost me just about $1000 MORE to fix it than I spent to buy it in the first place!

So, with head held in hands, I drove off. (This is a figure of speech, if I really held my head in my hands, how would I drive the truck?).

As I was heading home, I happened to pass by Bell Dodge.  (Are the hairs on the back of your neck standing up yet?  If not, they should be!)  I pulled in, hoping that I could look at (and maybe sneak a test ride) one of the new Dodge RAMs  (You know, the fantasy trucks),  as this has always brightened my mood in the past.  I talked to the salesman, he checked out my F150, we talked some more and looked at several trucks, and I started to feel better.  I told him that I really didn't have the money for a new truck, and prepared to leave.  He then dropped the bomb.  (Buy a truck or I'll kill your entire family!  -No, only kidding.  I did have  you going there though, didn't I?)

He told me if I bought a new truck, he would give me $5300 for the F150. Five BIG ones PLUS $350; FIFTY THREE FRANKLINS; 5K PLUS $350; 265 AJ's; let's face it, no matter how you describe it, it was a lot of moolah.   In fact, (as many of you may well remember), this was just about $1000 MORE than I spent to buy it in the first place!

I went home.  I thought about it.  I told my wife about it.  We both thought about it.  Then we thought about it some more.   We went to bed.

The very next day we picked a bunch of them weeds and we put them in the sun to dry.  (OOPS!  Wrong story)

The next morning Tanya, Gunnar, and I headed back to Bell Dodge to see if they were serious about the offer on my F150.

When we got there, the same salesman I had spoken to the previous evening was waiting for us.  (Psychic?  No, just a good salesman who knew a "kill" when he saw one. ;-> )

After much dickering, walking around and looking, whining, and fidgeting, (I told you Gunnar was with us!)  We finally found a truck I was happy with.  A truck I would be content with.  A truck that was the last 97 on their lot (remember, it was now 2 days after Christmas.)  A truck that the dealership wanted, no, say needed to sell quickly and cheaply.  A truck that I could afford.  (How much?  $37,500, after my trade in, $32,200)  A truck that would get me to and from work without breaking down. A truck that didn't smell funny.  A truck with a heater.  (Remember the last camping trip?) And WHAT A TRUCK IT IS!

OK, here is the part that I have been holding back.  Are you ready?  Hope so, here we go.

NEW 1997 Dodge RAM 2500HD (That means 3 quarter ton, Heavy Duty), 4 Wheel Drive, Club Cab, Longbed Pickup truck WITH custom blue paint, chrome wheels, cab clearance lights, V10, Power Windows, Power Door Locks, Cruise, AC, Tilt Wheel, custom cloth interior, Infinity CD....

-- wait a minute!  What was that back there?  Did it say V10!!??

Yes folks, I did.  I am the proud owner of a 300 Horsepower, 450 Foot/pounds of Torque, 8.0 Liter, Fuel-Injected, 10 Cylinder Monster Engine; which has been carefully packaged inside of the most beautiful, BIG pickup truck you have ever seen!

I think that when this summer rolls around, expect to find me in the mountains.

TTFN!
Devin.

In case you are interested, here are the full specs on the truck (taken from my window sticker):

2500HD Club Cab Pickup 155" WB Exterior Color: Brilliant Blue Pearl Coat Interior Color: Mist Gray: Engine: 8.0L Magnum V-10 MPI Engine Transmission: 4 Speed HD Automatic Transmission STANDARD EQUIPMENT: Shift-On-The-Fly Part-Time 4x4 Transfer Case Solid Axle Link-Coil Front Suspension & Sway Bar Sequential Multipoint Fuel Injection System Heavy Duty Gas-Charged Front & Rear Shock Absorbers Independent Front Coil Suspension Springs & Sway Bar Quick-Ratio Variable Assist Power Steering Stainless Steel Dual-Catalytic Converter Exhaust System 60-Inch Rear Leaf Springs - 8800N GVWR Auxiliary Power Outlet Gauges - Fuel / Volts / Engine Temp / Oil Pressure / Speedometer OPTIONAL EQUIPMENT: Laramie SLT Advantage Package N28H    Premium Decor Group    Premium Cloth 40/20/40 Bench Seat w/Cloth Rear Bench    Air Conditioning, Non-CFC Refrigerant    Power Windows & Door Locks    Seed Control & Tilt Steering    Light Group & Overhead Console    Bright Chrome Front & Rear Step Bumper w/Step Pads    Tachometer    Chrome Wheels (16x6.5) w/Center Caps    Power Exterior Mirrors Trailer Tow Group    Class IV Trailer Hitch Receiver    HD Flasher & Adapter Plug 4 Wheel Anti-Lock Brakes 4 Speed HD Automatic Transmission Anti-Spin Locking Differential 8.0L Magnum V-10 MPI Engine    Heavy Duty Service Group      - 136 Amp Alt / 750 Amp Battery      - HD Engine Cooling      - Auto Trans Auxiliary Oil Cooler      - Transfer Case Skid Plate 6-Way Power Driver Seat Cab Clearance Lights Air Dam AM/FM Stereo CD w/Premium Infinity Sound System Tires: LT245/75R16E A/T BSW (5)